In my early childhood day, having an engagement about sex was like a taboo. However apparently times have changed that children learn about sex as early as 4years old.
This directly implies that sex education is a vital topic to our children. All parents live in a world very different from their children. As a parent of a girl or boy you must seek to understand what’s happening across the street. As a parent; do you know about sex toys, social media, ‘phone’ sex, group sex and other crazy experiments on sex in kids parties. Have you seen these objects?
You’re child is your primary role and you must break the sex talk to him or her. I was glad that my mother used to have sex talks with me. When l joined high school l started going into my periods, she would call me more often to explain the effects of body changes. The fact that l attended a mixed school, she kept re echoing that once I start sleeping with boys, high chances were would become pregnant.
I was still naive, but her words stuck in my mind. And many girls and boys with whom we went to school with dropped out because they got pregnant at an early age and unfortunately they couldn’t continue with school because mama’s words l finished school, campus up till today am still standing.
Today as l minister with the young people most questions that arise from them are about masturbation especially from ladies oh yes, ladies masturbate a lot, especially virgins. Boys also masturbate, many boys start this pretty early and it is a subject as a parent you will need to talk about before they are 8years.
Sexual urge for virgins is strong. What makes it stronger is the novelty, newness, the mystery and the hear says about sex.
What’s Masturbation? It is fondling your genitals consistently to achieve orgasm. Ladies may stroke their clitoris while guys rub, massage or caress their penis.
Some ladies especially non-virgins use sex objects or toys namely candles, banana, small bottles, sticks, dildos or whatever represents a penis and do solo sex (having sex by yourself).
From teenage upward, there is a strong desire for sex. It’s a sure sign that the child is normal and capable of having and enjoying sex in marriage. Thus as a parent your sole responsibility is to have this healthy talk with your teenage, or young adult.
When you break the silence such questions are bound to come up?
So what then do l do when I get hot and horny? Have sex? If l cant have sex so why not masturbate! Why it is completely wrong and not the way out.
These are some of the consequences of masturbation that as a parent you must be bold and articulate them to your child.
Masturbation is not done in isolation. It is done with the image of someone in mind. It can be a lover, an EX, a celebrity, a married person, a crush, someone you like but incapable of having. You imagine having sex with them while masturbating. That is MENTAL FORNICATION
For ladies, while inserting all manner of objects, you may mistakenly deflower yourself and also introduce infection into your genitals and womb. It will be very difficult to convince your future partner that you never had sex with man except objects during your solo sex.
You kill your ability to enjoy sex in future. Millions of women don’t enjoy sex in marriage which leads to sexual frustration, adultery, lesbianism and feminism. If you are used to getting orgasm by yourself, you won’t be able to get it from your husband.
You start having sex in the dream with a known or unknown person (demonic entities other wise known as spiritual spouse).
You feel drained, dirty, empty, useless and powerless after each act.
You get a warped view of the opposite sex. You see them as sexual objects and start having sex with anything in skirt or trousers -you become promiscuous
What then should you do with your sexual urge? How do you handle the constant hunger for sex?
Avoid all dirty pictures, pornography videos, pictures and hot, romantic movies -they are powerful sexual triggers!
Avoid friends who say dirty,lewd and obscene things. Stop all sexy banters with friends and say only things that are pure, holy, needful and helpful.
Transmute your sexual energy: Channel your sexual energy into something great. Join sports, music clubs, etc
Teach the children not to be in isolation.
Overall
Masturbation is wrong, bad, demonic, destructive and sinful. Tell the child to avoid it and end it with speed if they are deeply involved in it.
I pray that God will grace each parent with the ability, wisdom to be the voice of reason in your childrens life and to appreciate their sexuality as they grow up.
Adrine 